Omm everyone for such wonderful greetings and birthday messages this year. I’m greatly humbled by those that shared positive messages with me that I truly did not expect! To return the love, I thought I’d share some of my learnings from the past year with everyone. Ideally this would be a proper blog post but at the moment I lack that luxury of a time to sit down and write so I’m typing on my phone! Training and upholding the duties of a yogi, renunciant, monk, ashram-take-carer is absolute good hard work! Om Guruji for giving me such privilege and such honor and responsibilities!
Let’s start with this week. I learned the lesson of humbleness – how being an absolute ‘nobody’, image-less, and always-at-service (seva) goes a long way. Working in utmost sincerity for what you want in life without a care about how others feel about you will get you very far.
I also learned how the ego absolutely hates humbleness. As soon as your physical body or image FEEL it’s being taken advantage of, and as soon as it feels attacked (feeling not good enough, helpless, or overwhelmed), the ego comes out and creates a coping mechanism – a personality, an attitude, a superiority and arrogance that YOU know better and you start to steer away from the truth of you and start to believe in the lies your ego is telling you about you. Truth is, as Guruji would say, nobody can take advantage of you. You and your intellect always have a choice what to do and uphold in life. If you care more about your image then all you will be building upon is your image (what you want others to believe you are).
Something extremely valuable I keep facing is the fact that you Cannot expect others to be the best of themselves (whether out of love or pressure or whatever reason you are backing it up with) if even YOU cannot be the best of you. The best of you will have enough compassion to understand how many obstacles the ego and the subconscious will put in front of you. You can get annoyed of that person as much as you want and only you will be the one that’s getting hurt.
Something I discovered yesterday when I made Thai food for my Guru was how much ego I go into when I want to impress and get praises. “There are no praises. There is only truth.” Guruji said. I was so adamant about impressing her that I overlooked many steps and totally messed up the dish – over cooked rice, too much garlic, mushy nutrition-nuggets. I also realized that because I knew that perfectly done-tasks don’t get praises, I always seem to (subconsciously) manipulate myself into doing either 80% of the job or a shoddy job just because at least I will get scolded (and get attention) from my superior! How manipulative is the subconscious mind? Must be because 92% on my test didn’t make dad happy (he wanted 100%) so I have programmed myself to bother-but-not-bother. Do you see how much I have prioritized “attention” and “praises” in my life because my mind is addicted to it growing up? How much suffering will it go into if it is deprived? I am only depleting myself of opportunities to find out how capable I truly am.
Last but not least – be willing to fall on your face. Be willing to learn and make mistakes, be willing to enrich your life with positive changes that will only happen if you let go of your fears. My Guruji is training me really hard on this one, considering that in my head I am actually such a miss-perfect-goody-two-shoe!!
Thank you Guruji for enriching my life with Your divine teachings, thank you Mom for always believing in me and loving me, thank you Dad for letting me know you didn’t praise me because you didn’t want me to ever stop working hard, thank you to my brothers for always supporting me whatever I am or am doing in life, thank you to my ashram soul-companions who are working hard in their own lessons to overcome their own life lessons, and thank you to all that have shared your love with me today. I am truly grateful! Om ✨🙏🏻💛✨🙏🏻💛✨🙏🏻💛🌸💕💖🌸💕💖🌸💕💖